All of this heated sectarian debate between rhymes-with-cone and rhymes-with-gone and we haven’t even gotten into whether you put the jam on first or the clotted cream on first.
Oh, there's no way I'm going near that one. We've been free of civil war for 372 years, and I don't want to be the one responsible for kicking off a new one.
My official statement on this:
"whether you prefer jam first or clotted cream first is either an entirely aesthetic choice, or there is a question here about which tastes better but that scientific work to determine which is better has yet to commence, making this - for now - purely a matter of personal preference."
PITCHFORKS DOWN PLEASE. LOOK, OVER THERE, IT'S NIGEL FARAGE, GO TAKE OUT YOUR RAGE ON HIM INSTEAD.
I'm a huge fan of these types of quests, so if you end up putting something together, please let me know here or at scott@goquesting.com and I will add it to my directory of quests and link to your blog about it.
BTW, one of my many quests is to drive the 22 major paved mountain passes over the Sierra Nevada mountains, which has been fun so far, though I haven't made nearly as much progress recently as I'd like.
I am called out on the Doctor Who thing. BritBox has them. Am only just through Patrick Troughton's era. And I love visiting the houses of writers and poets or settings of favorite stories. I had purpose until midlife and it was exhausting. Now in my 50s I am following the On A Whim philosophy. As long as it's real to me that's all that matters.
Excellent! I approve of this absurd, absurd quest. (My other half is doing it too, which is tricky as she's in Barcelona right now, outside the BritBox zone...)
And what a good word "whim" is, and so undervalued - like how "whimsical" often gets unfairly lumped in with "trivial".
Glad to be in good company! And so agree about whimsical. What I love about what you wrote is that it encourages play/imagination, which adults don't get enough of.
Reading this at 5am, with the rest of the household sensibly still abed and not facing a shift at Tesco, I was forced to muffle my giggles until the point at which I was obliged to laugh out loud. Nice one Mr S.
ps I am apparently a rare beast - southerner born and bred and yet use the "sconn" pronunciation.
Oh, I love this. Sort of like the look my wife and I give each other when we see something cool on the Baking Show, and just wordlessly we know that we need to get to the kitchen to try it *right now* (and it will likely fail, but still will taste good, and we'll have a blast). Or working on my drum practice pad to get my double-stroke roll better. Why? I have no idea. It's just fun, and feels weirdly Zen and relaxing when it's working. The fun is where life is.
I didn't need any proof whatsoever that you were already doing this stuff with exactly the right energy and the right attitude, but it's nice to see it, anyway.
"I have no idea, it's just fun" works for so many things. I might even make a note to have that on my gravestone (alongside "I told you I was ill", which I've stolen from Spike Milligan).
Oh my lord I thought that scone rhyming with gone was the posh pronunciation and scone rhyming with cone was the kind normal everyday people like me used.
1. Here in NYC everyone says "scone" (rhymes with "cone") and I have always said "scone" (rhymes with "gone") but only to be contrary and disingenuous and drive everyone crazy by pronouncing it wrong. I had no idea it was the actual preferred pronunciation in half the UK. Now I will have to reevaluate my strategy.
2. Scones are DELICIOUS.
3. I also love quests! In his "The Art of Noticing" substack Rob Walker had a great post about different varations of trying "Every Single X," and there are so many great examples in the comments. Visiting every single swimming pool in one's city seems to be a common pastime.
1) Woah! I love this act of rebellion - but not I feel I've tarnished it a bit by legimitizing it using half of the UK. What I therefore propose is that we find a new third pronunciation of "scone". Any ideas? I was thinking of how you pronounce the word "one", ie. "WON", and just adding "sc" at the front to make "SKWON". That should cause a healthy amount of chaos if used liberally in a public setting.
2) THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC FACT.
3) Yes! So good - I'm a paid subscriber, I love his work. I had that link in my "Further Reading" section at the bottom because I ran out of space (I was getting that "Email too big to send" thing) - but I've just embedded a link to Rob's post up into the main text.
OMG when I thought about going around pronouncing it SKWON I laughed like a crazy person and I am still laughing now as I write this. I can't wait to go to the overpriced hipster bakery around the corner with the line out the door and try this out!
As a steady consumer of Cafe Anne and smiling each time you buy an incidental at a Bodega, I am interested in what qualifies as an overpriced bakery item -- kidney or spleen?
Mr. Dolan, I don't know if this happens in your neck of the woods, but here in NYC we have been cursed with a spate of new donut shops offering $5 donuts. Which is just a contradiction in terms. When it costs more than $3, I think, it no longer even qualifies as a donut. The correct price for a donut, really is $1.29 but that hardly ever happens.
Now, I realise I’ve been reading so many Jack Carr and Mark Greaney thriller novels that my first thought on the “Every Single X” quest was to relate to “Get Off the X”, which is something you’d want to do with all possible speed, as they are generally “Danger Close”.
Visiting that sort of X might in itself be a great quest, especially as in this type of novel the event at the X is generally imaginary (or happened in an alternate branch of the multiverse, from whence I rather suspect most fiction comes), and might be a perfectly lovely destination all on its own.
Loved this Mike, and reading it on a rainy bank holiday Monday made me decide to actually get started on a silly quest that I've been mulling over for a while, so thanks!
Also, there's a small minor mistake in the bit about Doctor Who. They didn't store the shows on film, it was on Video Tape, that's why they could record over it. Films damn near permanent, unless it's the really old stuff that used to spontaneously combust and burn warehouses down, hence the bit on modern film footage that says "safety film". You can have that one on me sir! :-)
Newish subscriber here -- this was fun -- cannot resist the observation that the Isles are not famous for their food gifts to the world but scones are an exception -- such a treat whether sweet or savory. As for the pronunciation of the treat, regardless of how you may pronounce scone, you are nevertheless prone to say phone.
Hey Mark! This is true, re. "phone"! But how about the word "shone"? Because when we Brits listen to audiobooks narrated by Americans, when we hear them pronounce it "SHOWN," it's dead confused - because ours for that word is "SHONN". So I feel like - any attempt to apply a semblance of logic here has so many counterexamples because the English language is a total casserole of regional irrationalities in so many ways...it's looking for a universal law that doesn't exist.
Loved this. What an ace quest. I too am in the UK and think your map graphic has it about spot on. Who could want for more than a bun, cake or pastry quest. I am partial to a vanilla slice but sadly they seem to be a dying breed.🥲
Just been to Hull. My youngest wanted to go to The Deep with her friend and I got to sample the city centre. Think I might be living a vanilla slice sheltered life me. I may have to scout out a bakery here. 😇
Try small market towns like Brigg or Beverley, where they still have independent bakeries. Mind, I’m still looking for somewhere local that makes a decent Yorkshire curd tart, so I feel your pain. 😉
The pronunciation map for “scone” explains so many mini arguments in my life! I was born in North Lincs, now live in Hull, but my family are from Teesside - I’ve always said ‘sconn’ like them, not ‘scohn’ like the folks around me.
Anyway, if you say it sc-oh-ne, you can’t make the old joke: “Oh no, they’re all scone!” 😉
(Also: What’s the fastest city in Scotland? Scone )
(What’s the second fastest city in Scotland? Nairn )
Thank you, Kathlyn. Yes! East and West Yorkshire are such strangely defiant enclaves on that map (I'm from Hornsea, so I grew up hearing "S-*CONE*" all the time). And why north Lincolnshire as well? Is all this something to do with trading connections, proximity to the port on the Humber and therefore to the continent, and so on? But if THAT'S true, why isn't the same true for Teesside as well, and other river-connected areas on the east coast? What's going on? SO MUCH MYSTERY.
Dunno, but *loads* of things are said weird in ‘Ull and hereabouts 😉 (says the lass from south of the river - North Lincolnshire, where the accent can change 4 times in 10miles 😂)
Such a joy to read, as always! Somehow I'm reminded of a short-lived fixation I had on souvenir spoons as a child. As in, we'd go to a new national park -- maybe in Canada -- and I'd save up my coins to buy a little souvenir spoon at the gift shop. I'm honestly glad it didn't last or I ran out of coins (probably spent them all on candy) because then I'd have a bunch of tiny spoons now that I have no use for and don't want, but it's nice to be reminded of the joy of things that aren't pointless but that we call pointless. Thanks, Mike!
I did that kind of thing with sew-on patches. I think I had it in mind that I was going to add them to my camp blanket (I was a Girl Guide) but it never got done)
A longtime inspiration! He's literally written books around this stuff. (Update: I upped it into the main post, where it belongs - I ran out of kb in the original email).
All of this heated sectarian debate between rhymes-with-cone and rhymes-with-gone and we haven’t even gotten into whether you put the jam on first or the clotted cream on first.
Will there ever be peace?
Oh, there's no way I'm going near that one. We've been free of civil war for 372 years, and I don't want to be the one responsible for kicking off a new one.
My official statement on this:
"whether you prefer jam first or clotted cream first is either an entirely aesthetic choice, or there is a question here about which tastes better but that scientific work to determine which is better has yet to commence, making this - for now - purely a matter of personal preference."
PITCHFORKS DOWN PLEASE. LOOK, OVER THERE, IT'S NIGEL FARAGE, GO TAKE OUT YOUR RAGE ON HIM INSTEAD.
When are you running for office? This statement shows a true politicians gift for saying a lot while completely swerving the question at hand. Hahah
I can neither confirm not deny that this is a reply to your previous comment, but I can assure you that I have my very best people looking into it.
Ha Ha!
Oh, dear! Poor Nigel!
I rather like old Nigel. Can you please sic the dogs on Boris Johnson, instead?
Look, he has weird hair. And a Russian first name! (Shall we pronounce that BORE-is as do Westerners or as Russians do: boh-REECE? Or even bah-REECE.)
That was my thought from the beginning. When is he going to get to that debate 😂
No justice, no peace!
But I’m like, whatever, on the jam or clotted cream first issue. Both tasty on your scone rhymes with gone.
So maybe I didn't need to know Mr. Buckland was able to identify bat urine with one quick taste. 😝😝😝
WELL SPOTTED. This feels like a rare example of where curiosity is the absolute worst guide you could wish for.
you know, I've been vaguely thinking about driving over every mountain pass in Colorado, & writing a bit about each one...
course, I'd need a list of them, & I bet there's some controversy about what counts as a pass. off to research! *tips hat*
Hooray! I love this, Kellan. Please report back & point me to where you're writing it all up!
Once I decide where it's going -- might go on my patreon, might start a new blog for it -- I'll let you know!
That's a lot of mountain passes, and some of them are quite rugged! Wikipedia offers a nice rundown (perhaps incomplete though) of the state's mountain passes: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_mountain_passes_in_Colorado
I'm a huge fan of these types of quests, so if you end up putting something together, please let me know here or at scott@goquesting.com and I will add it to my directory of quests and link to your blog about it.
BTW, one of my many quests is to drive the 22 major paved mountain passes over the Sierra Nevada mountains, which has been fun so far, though I haven't made nearly as much progress recently as I'd like.
I am called out on the Doctor Who thing. BritBox has them. Am only just through Patrick Troughton's era. And I love visiting the houses of writers and poets or settings of favorite stories. I had purpose until midlife and it was exhausting. Now in my 50s I am following the On A Whim philosophy. As long as it's real to me that's all that matters.
Excellent! I approve of this absurd, absurd quest. (My other half is doing it too, which is tricky as she's in Barcelona right now, outside the BritBox zone...)
And what a good word "whim" is, and so undervalued - like how "whimsical" often gets unfairly lumped in with "trivial".
Glad to be in good company! And so agree about whimsical. What I love about what you wrote is that it encourages play/imagination, which adults don't get enough of.
Yes! I love the way you think!
Reading this at 5am, with the rest of the household sensibly still abed and not facing a shift at Tesco, I was forced to muffle my giggles until the point at which I was obliged to laugh out loud. Nice one Mr S.
ps I am apparently a rare beast - southerner born and bred and yet use the "sconn" pronunciation.
Eeeee. Lass. The North welcomes your loyalty to the cause.
And I promise that when we sweep southwards, baking scones and correcting pronunciations as we go, you will be spared a telling-off.
Oh, I love this. Sort of like the look my wife and I give each other when we see something cool on the Baking Show, and just wordlessly we know that we need to get to the kitchen to try it *right now* (and it will likely fail, but still will taste good, and we'll have a blast). Or working on my drum practice pad to get my double-stroke roll better. Why? I have no idea. It's just fun, and feels weirdly Zen and relaxing when it's working. The fun is where life is.
I didn't need any proof whatsoever that you were already doing this stuff with exactly the right energy and the right attitude, but it's nice to see it, anyway.
"I have no idea, it's just fun" works for so many things. I might even make a note to have that on my gravestone (alongside "I told you I was ill", which I've stolen from Spike Milligan).
Oh, good idea on the gravestone thing!
And ever so much more pleasant than my current quote from the Roman Dictator Lucius Cornelius Sulla, “No better friend. No worse enemy”.
Oh my lord I thought that scone rhyming with gone was the posh pronunciation and scone rhyming with cone was the kind normal everyday people like me used.
OMG I have SO MUCH TO SAY.
1. Here in NYC everyone says "scone" (rhymes with "cone") and I have always said "scone" (rhymes with "gone") but only to be contrary and disingenuous and drive everyone crazy by pronouncing it wrong. I had no idea it was the actual preferred pronunciation in half the UK. Now I will have to reevaluate my strategy.
2. Scones are DELICIOUS.
3. I also love quests! In his "The Art of Noticing" substack Rob Walker had a great post about different varations of trying "Every Single X," and there are so many great examples in the comments. Visiting every single swimming pool in one's city seems to be a common pastime.
https://robwalker.substack.com/p/every-single-x
4. Thanks for the SHOUTOUT Mike! Much appreciated!!!
1) Woah! I love this act of rebellion - but not I feel I've tarnished it a bit by legimitizing it using half of the UK. What I therefore propose is that we find a new third pronunciation of "scone". Any ideas? I was thinking of how you pronounce the word "one", ie. "WON", and just adding "sc" at the front to make "SKWON". That should cause a healthy amount of chaos if used liberally in a public setting.
2) THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC FACT.
3) Yes! So good - I'm a paid subscriber, I love his work. I had that link in my "Further Reading" section at the bottom because I ran out of space (I was getting that "Email too big to send" thing) - but I've just embedded a link to Rob's post up into the main text.
4) Thank YOU for your brilliant work, Anne. :)
Are you ready for another OMG Mr. Sowden?
OMG when I thought about going around pronouncing it SKWON I laughed like a crazy person and I am still laughing now as I write this. I can't wait to go to the overpriced hipster bakery around the corner with the line out the door and try this out!
😂😂😂 I EAGERLY AWAIT THE NEXT PART OF THIS STORY.
As a steady consumer of Cafe Anne and smiling each time you buy an incidental at a Bodega, I am interested in what qualifies as an overpriced bakery item -- kidney or spleen?
Mr. Dolan, I don't know if this happens in your neck of the woods, but here in NYC we have been cursed with a spate of new donut shops offering $5 donuts. Which is just a contradiction in terms. When it costs more than $3, I think, it no longer even qualifies as a donut. The correct price for a donut, really is $1.29 but that hardly ever happens.
Oh now I am noticing you already mentioned Rob's post. Well, it for sure deserves a double mention!
Now, I realise I’ve been reading so many Jack Carr and Mark Greaney thriller novels that my first thought on the “Every Single X” quest was to relate to “Get Off the X”, which is something you’d want to do with all possible speed, as they are generally “Danger Close”.
Visiting that sort of X might in itself be a great quest, especially as in this type of novel the event at the X is generally imaginary (or happened in an alternate branch of the multiverse, from whence I rather suspect most fiction comes), and might be a perfectly lovely destination all on its own.
Loved this Mike, and reading it on a rainy bank holiday Monday made me decide to actually get started on a silly quest that I've been mulling over for a while, so thanks!
Also, there's a small minor mistake in the bit about Doctor Who. They didn't store the shows on film, it was on Video Tape, that's why they could record over it. Films damn near permanent, unless it's the really old stuff that used to spontaneously combust and burn warehouses down, hence the bit on modern film footage that says "safety film". You can have that one on me sir! :-)
Ah! Good! I wondered about that, too 😂
Newish subscriber here -- this was fun -- cannot resist the observation that the Isles are not famous for their food gifts to the world but scones are an exception -- such a treat whether sweet or savory. As for the pronunciation of the treat, regardless of how you may pronounce scone, you are nevertheless prone to say phone.
Hey Mark! This is true, re. "phone"! But how about the word "shone"? Because when we Brits listen to audiobooks narrated by Americans, when we hear them pronounce it "SHOWN," it's dead confused - because ours for that word is "SHONN". So I feel like - any attempt to apply a semblance of logic here has so many counterexamples because the English language is a total casserole of regional irrationalities in so many ways...it's looking for a universal law that doesn't exist.
(And part of the reason it doesn't exist is how much things change: how long before the UK pronounces "shone" as "SHOWN"? It might happen! Globalism is already bending UK English in all sorts of ways: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jul/13/american-english-language-study So interesting to see...)
The one that gets me when I’m reading (and is entirely due to American pronunciation) is: “make DUE”!!
No - it’s “make DO”, but those words sound the same in some (non-British) accents, hence the confusion.
Loved this. What an ace quest. I too am in the UK and think your map graphic has it about spot on. Who could want for more than a bun, cake or pastry quest. I am partial to a vanilla slice but sadly they seem to be a dying breed.🥲
Still see vanilla slices in the bakeries round Hull
(Go on, come here for ya hols, I dares ya!)
As someone who grew up in Hornsea a few dozen miles north of Hull, I approve of this bakery quest.
Just been to Hull. My youngest wanted to go to The Deep with her friend and I got to sample the city centre. Think I might be living a vanilla slice sheltered life me. I may have to scout out a bakery here. 😇
Try small market towns like Brigg or Beverley, where they still have independent bakeries. Mind, I’m still looking for somewhere local that makes a decent Yorkshire curd tart, so I feel your pain. 😉
Sounds like you’ve found your quest!!
Skeltons Bakery for the win (sadly no longer with us, but Cooplands is your best
bet): https://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/news/history/things-you-miss-most-long-8280631
Cooplands was *exactly* where I was thinking of (might have to pop round to our nearest one later on 😂)
They still have vanilla slices in Scotland...
Kaboom. I know where my next holiday will be 🥳
Come to Australia, the ‘snot block’ (vanilla slice) is alive and well. https://www.thegreataustralianvanillaslicetriumphmerbein.com/
That was a great listen, thanks 😊
The pronunciation map for “scone” explains so many mini arguments in my life! I was born in North Lincs, now live in Hull, but my family are from Teesside - I’ve always said ‘sconn’ like them, not ‘scohn’ like the folks around me.
Anyway, if you say it sc-oh-ne, you can’t make the old joke: “Oh no, they’re all scone!” 😉
(Also: What’s the fastest city in Scotland? Scone )
(What’s the second fastest city in Scotland? Nairn )
😆
Thank you, Kathlyn. Yes! East and West Yorkshire are such strangely defiant enclaves on that map (I'm from Hornsea, so I grew up hearing "S-*CONE*" all the time). And why north Lincolnshire as well? Is all this something to do with trading connections, proximity to the port on the Humber and therefore to the continent, and so on? But if THAT'S true, why isn't the same true for Teesside as well, and other river-connected areas on the east coast? What's going on? SO MUCH MYSTERY.
Dunno, but *loads* of things are said weird in ‘Ull and hereabouts 😉 (says the lass from south of the river - North Lincolnshire, where the accent can change 4 times in 10miles 😂)
Such a joy to read, as always! Somehow I'm reminded of a short-lived fixation I had on souvenir spoons as a child. As in, we'd go to a new national park -- maybe in Canada -- and I'd save up my coins to buy a little souvenir spoon at the gift shop. I'm honestly glad it didn't last or I ran out of coins (probably spent them all on candy) because then I'd have a bunch of tiny spoons now that I have no use for and don't want, but it's nice to be reminded of the joy of things that aren't pointless but that we call pointless. Thanks, Mike!
I did that kind of thing with sew-on patches. I think I had it in mind that I was going to add them to my camp blanket (I was a Girl Guide) but it never got done)
That reminds me of the Girl Scout (U.S. version) of patches I collected and was going to sew on my vest and never really got around to ... !
I love that you included Brendan Leonard's piece at the end there. He is a master of this sort of thing!
A longtime inspiration! He's literally written books around this stuff. (Update: I upped it into the main post, where it belongs - I ran out of kb in the original email).
Wow. Just...wow. A triumph of the wit.
Thank you, Don!
Unless "wit" was a typo and it's missing a "t" at the beginning...
You know me better than that. It was such a pleasure to read.