37 Comments

I love you to the sky and back, my Mike. This was hard on both of us but you're strong and we're stronger together. ❤️

We just finished celebrating Christmas dinner with family here in Costa Rica and you've been present in my heart and within the fam every second.

We've got this. And I'm proud of you for writing about this. ❤️

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Ps. All the comments here made me feel emotional and grateful as I read through them all. I feel like saying thank you to everyone for loving Mike so much too.❤️ It's absolutely beautiful to see.

Sincerely,

Grateful partner M. 🥰

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I have fear of flying, Mike. This from someone who has flown everywhere. It happened in my mid-40's as I was taking off from Sydney Airport and has been with me ever since. I take Valium for flights and fortunately it works. For me its not the fear of being 'up there'. It's the claustrophobia in the beer can!!!! I would love to fly to Nepal with my husband but I think I'd have to have intravenous diazepam to get me there!

This from someone who believes strongly in the power of Mindfulness CBT.

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> long before I was a twinkle in either of their eyes..

This is the first time I'm seeing someone do this to themselves. Bravo. 🙌

On a serious note, I have a terrifying fear of heights. I can't be on a balcony over 4 floors up. And I can't rid myself of the thought that this is how I will die. It's such a fear that I even imagine myself jumping off, just to end it all. So while I don't share your fear, I do share the sense of a phobia. And I will be curious to learn how you tackle and overcome it next year. Best wishes, friend! ❤️

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A boat perhaps? A leisurely cruise to Costa Rica? I don't know which would alarm me more, flying or sailing tbh. Brains are funny things. Be kind to yours, it's doing its best. 😏

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Oh, Mike, i’m so very sorry. It can be hard to be a human. ❤️

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Thank you for this, Mike. As a therapist, I am continuously, amazed by how phobias can come and go, and a new phobia can arise at the strangest of times. It’s as if -when we feel out of control of one thing, we try to control the next, or the strangest fears can just randomly set in. I can relate to this. Sending you my thoughts.

I’ve been there.

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So funny, Mike. But I know first-hand about phobia and know they're no joke. Best of luck getting to Costa Rica with your psyche intact!

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Mike,

Thanks so much for sharing this with us. None of us are exactly who we want to be, but somehow we are each exactly what we need to be. And we're here to help each other through whatever it is we're going through, which is often baffling. Your story in itself is just the kind of help somebody needs right now.

Merry Christmas, Mike.

P.S. I'm glad the apartment was still there and the story about your mom & dad & the moped was wonderful.

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I’m reading this from the birthplace of aviation, Dayton, Ohio, where 121 years ago two brothers flung themselves off the bottom of the atmosphere into the air, sparking this whole era of unnatural human travel, not fully understanding aerodynamics. Not a flight goes by that I am on where I am not reminded that we still don’t quite understand how an airplane stays in the air. How I still board an airplane knowing that not one person flying or controlling the airplane understands it is a bit of a mystery to me, too, and something I shove down deep beyond my consciousness for the duration of the flight. I wonder how many of my fellow travelers are also aware that we really don’t know how we’re staying in the air. I wonder how the ones who do know talk themselves into taking the flight anyway.

Ironically, I love being in airports. My favorite day of the year to be in an airport is Christmas Day. Someday I’ll examine why that is, but like aerodynamics, I’ll accept that is just is without understanding why.

Twelve… right?! 😀

Twelve months of reading and writing about the air. Perhaps you will finally solve the mystery of how airplanes stay in the air. Merry Christmas!

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Love Dayton, birthplace of aviation, and like you I love airports. I was so happy to be back at DTW after Covid just to pick up some relatives. Great comment.

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I LOVE that tunnel y'all have at DTW... a sound and visual experience... (I have a pet name for it, the electric v*g^na... don't tell anyone 🤭🤫) 528 Hz i'd like to believe.

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Ouch, so glad you at least got a post out of this, wishing you all the best as you figure out how to get to rejoin M.

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Highly recommend Reid Wilson. He’s local to me but accessible via his website, books, and online seminars. Panic, OCD, anxiety disorders are his areas of expertise, and fear of flying is one of his specialties.

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Merry Christmas from Cardiff, Mike! I’m so sorry you’re spending it away from M. Thanks for a year of terrific writing and teaching us to do the same! Wishing you nothing but the best and an overcoming of all our fears in 2025!

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<hugs>

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Thinking of you and hoping the phobia goes away as mysteriously as it showed up. I have had one panic attack in my life, in med school, sitting in a lecture with 200 other students. I didn't have to do anything more challenging than sit in the dark and not lose control of myself for an hour. The panic attack was caused by starting an antidepressant (they didn't tell me how depressing being a med student is). I hope you are able to get to Costa Rica.

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I hope that despite the phobia-separated time, you and M are able to share small joys across the miles. Panic attacks are so exhausting. Hope you find a way through to get through it affecting future Christmas trips. Thanks for all your writing.

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